Thoughtful reviews, the Boulder film scene

Best in Show

Enjoyable and funny, light and quick look at eccentric dog breeders —Marty Mapes (review...)

" You’re not gonna go yellow-pants on me are ya? "
— Jennifer Jason Leigh, Kansas City

MRQE Top Critic

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If you’re a truly devoted fan of film critic Marty Mapes, you may recall reading some devilish end-of-year movie quote contests. Well, he’s back, with 30 quotes from 2002.

We considered setting up a contest, with a fee to enter and winners getting some sort of prize. We also considered selling the answers as a Movie Habit fundraiser. In the end we decided simply to show you the quotes this week and not show you the answers until next week.

Each quote below comes from a 2002 movie. For each one, see if you can identify both the movie and the speaker.

  1. Sometimes God likes to put two guys in a paper bag and just let ‘em rip
     
  2. Here’s my first question. Do you think it’s a little dangerous handing out guns at a bank?
     
  3. We will Aryanize you
     
  4. You shouldn’t trust anyone — certainly not the Attorney General
     
  5. Dear Ndugu, I hope you’re sitting down because I’ve got some bad news...
     
  6. So you want collateral damage, huh? I’ll give you collateral damage.
     
  7. There’s mom and dad’s pig-pen!
     
  8. ...well then you should have worn a different dress
     
  9. I’ll festoon my bedchamber with his guts!
     
  10. I was here. I existed. I was young and I was happy and someone cared enough about me in this world to take my picture.
     
  11. Nature is overrated
     
  12. I sort of am a lawyer now
     
  13. Well, I own the hotel and I live there. My life is very much like Monopoly.
     
  14. Pixies can be devilishly tricky little blighters
     
  15. I have to get more pudding
     
  16. I was going to kill my heroine but I’ve changed my mind
     
  17. Nice hobbitses
     
  18. Nobody goes into the valley of death. That’s why they call it the valley of death.
     
  19. What’s weird is when you go to church and eat the body and blood of Christ.
     
  20. In this town, murder is a form of entertainment
     
  21. Transportation is a very precise business
     
  22. You know, I’ve never completely understood that expression, but no, I’m not shitting you
     
  23. 90% of it is in the clothes
     
  24. I’m sorry about the typo
     
  25. I’ll never have it better than I did in this lifetime (2 bonus points for identifying the off-screen relevance of this quote)
     
  26. I deserve a lot of ‘tat’ for what I’ve got to give
     
  27. Ladies and gentlemen, and invited transgendered forms...
     
  28. Yeah they call me rabbit; this is a turtle race
     
  29. Don’t be afraid of death, be afraid of the unlived life
     
  30. God help you if you write voiceover